We posted this week on Narcissism and the difficulty of coming to see through our self-constructed image(s) of ourselves in order to get to the reality that lay within. This is not an easy task to undertake and actually demands an admirable degree of bravery. But it’s worth it! It’s worth it personally as well as being worth it on behalf of those within our closest circles of fellowship and family.

To love, truly love, means to be open to deep interior exploration of the self. But as Jung observes, we tend to be willing to do just about anything other than launch off into such a soul-searching exercise. Why? Why is it so painful to contemplate what we might find? Why is the thought of being wrong and in need of travelling another direction so threatening?

In part, I think when we consider such a process the egoic-false-self really kicks into high gear. We need to be aware that the ego lives in the past and the future – and since soul-searching occurs always in the ‘present’ – it appears as something utterly destructive to the ego — so the ego fights it. And since the ego has us convinced that ‘it’ is our true identity (‘it’ being the equivalent of the thoughts and stories about ourselves that we and others have always proclaimed), nothing is more threatening than to suddenly discover otherwise.

And yet this is the point of soul-searching to begin with – the search to find true North, so to speak; the search to unveil the reality of who we are and were created to be. As Tolle reminds us, “The word ‘I’ embodies the greatest error and the deepest truth, depending on how it is used.”

A strong dose of contemplative interior exploration helps us see which of these polarities we’re living in. Are we deluded or grounded? And what if we discover that we are the former? Then what? ‘What will become of us?,’ cries the ego.

Hopefully what will become of us is the realization that we are not what we see in the mirror. We are not our form and though living in time, we are not imprisoned by it. What we see is impermanent and we are eternal. We are part of the “I Am-ness” of all things. We are part of a divine nature that touches, yet transcends all that we see.

Once our inner journeys begin to reveal such things our spirit is released from imprisonment in matter. We begin to grasp our identities as being formless and enraptured in the one unifying Presence of all that exists. Boundaries begin to fall, relationships begin to flourish, the error gives way to the truth as the true becomes evident and re-prioritized.

Resist the absurd avoidance techniques of the egoic-false self and begin that journey of deep interior exploration. The first step is a willingness to look. The second is to clothe yourself in humility, compassion and love – for you and for others – and then see what you see.

Hope you have a contemplative weekend!

So what ends up happening? Our self-cherishing ends up being at the expense of others, and the wake of our relationships closely resembles a tornado. The destruction is everywhere… but hey, we’re happy.

And that is one of the surest signs of narcissistic behavior – when our happiness is always more important than, even though at the expense of, others. It’s as if we’re trying to reverse the lesson of Jesus – that to find our lives, we must lose them. Instead, we seek to find our lives by discarding relationships that cramp our style, slow us down, are a burden, and keep us from achieving the trite slogan of ‘be all you can be’… hmmm, maybe that Army commercial really has impacted the way we think. But then again, you’re risking your life by enlisting into such a philosophy!

It’s a sad but now grateful truth that once upon a time I crossed this bridge in my own journey. And the kicker of narcissism is that it makes it incredibly easy to convince yourself that you’re being ‘spiritual’ the entire time you’re being wrong-headed. And believing you are spiritual can make it tempting to believe that any and all other voices in your world are delusional, ill-informed or simply unable to see the spiritual reality of things on as high a level as you are.

Such thinking is merely a sleight of hand, however, substituting our idea of G-D or spirituality for permission to do whatever we want regardless of the consequences. This type of thinking allows us to follow our own path with complete blessings from ‘above’ – it’s yet another way of distracting us from facing reality.

If a person is to discover reality in such narcissistic head-trips, the evidence is everywhere evident – especially in their wake. In times of deep self-cherishing behavior, the only way to face the mirror is to first face the path of destruction we’ve generated and continue to create. It’s the only way to return – before the damage is too great – to sanity. Otherwise, we are doomed to exit the fog far too long after any chance for restored relationship(s) is possible. And picking up the pieces at that point is truly a humpty-dumpty moment.

Freedom without responsibility is ‘non-sense.’ It’s an illusion of independence that is not based in reality. It is an illusion that is loveless and destructive. And it is an illusion that will haunt us, in some ways, for the rest of our lives.

Each day awake to love. Awake to compassion for all people, places and things.

Awake to the truth that is you.

YOU are LOVE.

Though nobody knows, this seemed like a great point to ponder.

A lot of people live ‘woe is me’ lives, as if they’re banking it all for the next life. But what if that’s not the case? What if this world is the sole determinate of the next one? What if the time we have now is to set the trajectory for all we will experience later?

For many, this would come as quite a shock!

Perhaps our swift travels through this dimension will end with a face-to-face meeting with the One who made it all – and the only question we’ll be asked to answer is, ‘Did you have fun?’ It’s no different than how we approach our children after attempting to give them a most excellent adventure via a ball game, a carnival or a backyard fortress, hoping they’ll not only play fully, but will be eternally grateful that we worked so hard to provide it for them.

Here we find ourselves in a magical world where there are brilliant gifts that have been created for us. They’re everywhere to be found; such things as sight and sound, taste and touch; they are waterfalls and mountain scenery and beach fronts and rippling brooks. There are seasons of change that bring us something new, something to change the pace and birth within a sense of renewal – something to help us ebb and flow with the spectacular nature around us that keeps on singing its song of new life.

Some people are so busy living in ways others have sold them on living that they end up missing out on life itself. Think of this the next time somebody says that ‘our kids won’t have it as good as we (their parents) did: They won’t be as affluent, live in the same size homes, drive as nice a car, etc.’

The bare facts of this statement might well be true. But what if, by having something different than what we’ve always been sold as ‘the good life,’ our kids actually have more by possessing – and being possessed by – less? What if tomorrow’s world is filled with people who scoff at the old illusory stories of ‘the successful life’ and ‘the American dream’ filled with working parents enduring weeks of 70 hours or greater with little or no vacation to show for it? What if they figure out that we, their parents, were really duped… and they figure out how to sing a song of simplicity whereas all we knew was a dragging dirge about how to struggle to survive?

Maybe we’re supposed to see that the story we follow in the Good Book ends with the song of ‘Moses and the Lamb.’ It’s a victory song. It’s a celebratory chorus to carry us through our days and help us embrace the ups and downs of world that, while being a lot of things, is never supposed to be boring, joyless and bankrupt of familial celebration.

So what’s your song? And is it possible that it’s time for a new one?

The circumstances surrounding this letter are probably important to know before (or as) one addresses the qualities of such ‘fruit.’ So up front give me a moment to provide a little background regarding what was occurring in the Galatian situation that prompted the writing of this letter to begin with.

During the rise of Christianity in the first century, for a period of time there were a lot of Jewish people who followed Jesus but also demanded that new Gentile converts to this newfound Jesus-following also convert to Judaism. The main argument stemmed from the fact that the Jewish temple in Jerusalem still stood, that many Jewish Christian believers still attended its services and that, generally speaking, God still dwelt in the most holy place of this temple. For many believing Jews, you could follow Jesus but only on the condition that you continued to closely observe the religious law.

Paul, however, argued that a person was in relationship with God because of the faith of Christ, not law observance or other outward works a person had to ‘do.’ In the process of writing this letter to Gentile Christians, at one point he speaks to something that, in his mind, is apart from law – the ‘fruit’ of the Spirit.

For Paul such fruit is: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control, adding that against such things, ‘there is no law.’ I think it’s probably significant that Paul refers to all of these as a singular ‘fruit’ of the Spirit rather than as individual ‘fruits’ (plural) of the Spirit.

From Paul’s vantage point, they all proceed from our living out of the Spirit – the deepest (and simplest) disclosure of who we really are – the true self. It’s like saying that once you ‘get’ or ‘understand’ the story of how Jesus came so show us our unity with the Unnameable, these things tend to naturally flow from such an understanding.

I think the need to meditate on these things is because of how easily they sometimes come and go depending on outward circumstances. In other words, when life gets tough, if we’re not consciously living out of this sort of realization, such fruit will not carry the day – instead, the egoic false self will.

There is an old Tibetan metaphor that describes this process of fleeting attributes by saying that in such instances they prove to ‘consist of many small puddles that can evaporate easily rather than a deep, expansive, long-lasting reservoir.’

I like that metaphor. It helps reinforce for me the need to be constant in my guard against the ego and in the inherent weakness of simply living according to my code of ethic (law) or based upon my own (false) self-discipline.

There is a higher power. A higher Source of discipline and strength. And by intentionally living into this Source, the fruit is more likely to be there when it is most needed. As a result, our suffering and the suffering we cause others is most often averted.

So, is our practice and consciousness indicative of ‘puddles’ or ‘reservoirs’? I like the latter. Today, dig deep!

Blessings.

Geez, I guess both are somewhat in the eye of the beholder.

But all of this contemplating makes me ask, “What if?” What if a person invests their entire life obsessing over politics and political parties and heaven ends up being filled with people of the opposite party… they being the only exception? What if that person were you? How would you respond to this ‘mind-blowing-flabbergasting-God-ordained’ reality?

Even more, what if you are highly prejudiced regarding other races of people and heaven ends up being filled with those you detest?

What if you are a religious zealot and exclusivist and heaven ends up a habitation for ‘the other guys?’ If you’re a Christian, could you live in a place called heaven if it were really a place for all the Muslim faithful? How would you deal with such a turn?

What if you’re a staunch, by-the-book, fundamentalist and you suddenly discover that heaven is really filled with those irreverent neighbors of yours who chose a trip to the lake on Sundays over a trip to some ornate brick and mortar building you knew as a ‘church’?

What if you lived your whole life dedicated to ‘being holy as your heavenly Father is holy’… only to discover that the holiness of God was nowhere near your conception?

What if you had a pet-doctrine or belief for which you gave your all, only to get to ‘heaven’ and discover that you were wrong? Dead wrong. Harmfully wrong.  Would it still be heaven for you? Could you adapt? Would you change then?

What if you don’t like off-color humor and upon arriving to heaven Jesus is doing some stand-up routine using what you perceive to be inappropriate language (humoring all the ones you didn’t think would be there – the prostitutes, drug dealers and murderers)? God loves it, roars with laughter, but you don’t… it doesn’t fit your image of the rules – it’s not, according to your view of things, appropriate. Would you want to stay?

In other words, what if heaven turns out to be the total opposite of everything you project it to be; the opposite of everything for which you have lived and dedicated your life? Would it still be heaven?

Could heaven be something God really likes but you don’t?

Most would answer that last question with a resounding ‘NO.’ Mainly because we all tend to think we know God – we know his character – his ‘likes’ and ‘dislikes’… which makes me also want to ask – What if God is a She and you’re a misogynistic jerk?

In my best Dr. Phil voice, ‘How’s yer heven lookin now?’ ‘How’s that workin for ya?’

I have a couple of points here: One, I think much of our ideas of heaven are just as much a projection of our own likes-dislikes-beliefs as is our conception of God himself/herself/non-personal/personal/Spirit/energy. Two, I think most people make a list of all kinds of ‘good’ things and call that heaven and then make a list of all sorts of ‘bad’ things and call that hell. Then the goal of life is to try to do what is necessary to make it to heaven and avoid going to hell (this question is laying aside the myth of hell for a moment to get to a broader point here).

Siding with the idea of mystery and humility, I’d prefer to see my (our) journey here on earth as something more in line with transcending both our ideas of ‘good’ and ‘evil.’ In other words, being as in-tune with God and humankind as possible while also remaining fully awake to making adjustments along the way. Sometimes, radical adjustments.

And I’d prefer to leave all such discussions of the afterlife in the hands of Mystery as well – it just seems better that way. This approach helps me be more flexible and compassionate, open to change, learning new insights, becoming more nuanced in my understanding of a plethora of things I think I ‘already’ know but really don’t.

And what if one day I, too, come to discover that living for such an ethic missed the point by a country mile? Well, at least this ethic will allow me to respond with something I find myself saying far too infrequently as it is…

‘Sorry, I was wrong.’

That’s heaven.